Not Feeling It
The Lord is my shepherd;
I shall not want.
He makes me to lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside the still waters.
He restores my soul;
He leads me in the paths of righteousness
For His name’s sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil;
My cup runs over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life;
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord
Forever. Psalm 23 (NKJV)
There are times when you just do not have it in you. Yesterday, I took on a lot of things and did them all successfully. However, the toll of it had left me exhausted and tired. Trying to write was the last thing on my agenda, and even as I had taken a bit of rest, there was just nothing there. I went upstairs and was saying to myself and God that I just did not have it in me to have my nightly prayer with Him. Gasp!
Many individuals may find themselves questioning how such thoughts could arise. However, I wonder how many of you have also struggled in that same arena at some time or another, particularly when experiencing fatigue or a perceived lack of spiritual connection. I remembered a story about a man who first came to God and had no idea how to talk to Him or felt worthy to even talk to Him. His spiritual mentor simply said, “Tell God that.” And at that moment, I went to my knees and told God how I felt. As the words came out, the peace and relief from God’s comfort came over me, and I felt connected once again.
How often do we focus on the structure or our circumstance assuming it needs to be a certain way to go to God? The thing is God is available to us no matter our circumstance, and believe it or not, He does not care about how structured our prayers to Him are. As we grow in faith, we become more comfortable approaching Him. However, it is important to remember that even when we are not at our best, simply going to Him is enough. Today’s verses, which is the entire 23rd Psalm, gives reassurance of not only who God is but how much He loves us. It begins with, “The lord is my shepherd; I shall not want,” which reminds us that God’s care is constant regardless of our circumstances. In fact, the first 5 verses ending with ‘my cup runs over’ are David’s acknowledgments of both God’s provisions and presence. These hit me in the heart particularly because even as I may be tired in a moment and not feeling the spirit of God in me, I can still acknowledge Him. When I was in that moment yesterday, simply saying, “God, I am here,” brought me comfort and reminded me of His presence. We do not have to ask Him for anything, and it may not even require us to act. That is what makes the final verse powerful. It is to say that we know God is with us and we are with Him. That is all that matters.
Life may be complex, but building a relationship with God is straightforward. In times of struggle and fatigue, “Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.”” (Matthew 11:28) As we grow spiritually and improve our prayers, the fundamentals of our relationship with God are that He loves us unconditionally and seeks us out. He does not expect perfection from us. He expects faithfulness. We are called to always follow Him, not just when circumstances are ideal. Let us never lose sight of that. Can you recall a time when you felt God's presence despite not being at your best? How has your approach to prayer and your relationship with God evolved over time? What steps can you take to deepen your faith and become more comfortable approaching God? My prayer is that we simply acknowledge God’s presence in our lives even when we are simply not feeling it. Amen.